You have done your best!
Standing on the left is SAM with his friends moments before the results were out, not knowing he'd cry later. (Picture: Courtesy of JHM)
I can see a lot of me in him. His hair, his facial features, his body figure… Just like me, his skin tone is a bit dark unlike his big sister and the kid brother, contrasts heavily to his mom’s very fair complexion. Kids are always kids but generally speaking, he is the type of kid that considerably very well-mannered, well-disciplined, charming and easy to handle. Errr… as of me when I was a kid, those traits… in a scale of 1 – 10; I’d give myself 7.5. Yeahhh righhht… may be 5 out of 10. Nope… it can’t be lower than that! He would take any advice from either his teachers or parents literally.
When the mother said he could only lie down at least one-half hour after a meal, he’d time his stopwatch to exactly 30 minutes then he’d lounge around if he had to and had it observed religiously. An Ustazah told him one has to answer to parents’ call even while in-prayer, and he did, then he’d start it all over again. I felt sorry for him and told him to go by with it. I said watching TV is allowed until 8:00 pm only; right on the dot he’d either have it switched off or he’d be doing his school works. 10:00 pm in bed? Precisely on the minute! That is Sam! Sure he is a kind of kid that parents would love to have. In fact Fara and Edrin are no exceptions either; it’s just that I want to focus on Sam in this entry for an obvious reason.
Slightly more than an hour ago, UPSR results were out. Sam sent me text message telling me he’s got 4A 1B, some 10 minutes before I start writing this. I called him up right away and he said he was sorry for not getting straight A’s and he was so depressed with the results. Obvious blemishes in my eyes while talking to him – he talked with that kind of tone of voice apparently not happy with the results, I know he had cried, and very quick I consoled him up telling that was very good already, nothing to be sorry and I was equally happy as him getting all A’s.
Regardless of the results he’s got, I am actually very happy considering his promising performance months before the actual exams took place. Rather unfortunate he didn’t make it all A’s. I’ve never made a pass to him letting out my expectation as not to pressure him up and in the first place, straight A’s isn’t the scale I measure things up anyway. I regularly went through checking all the topics on the syllabus for each subject months before the exams making sure he knows what he had learned whilst the bigger contributions had been by his mother, to patiently be by his side as he finishes his home works every night and to reward him with a cup (read: mug) of milo moments before going to bed. We both parents knew he didn’t need tuitions when he was coping well with it. The existing loads at school are already too much for him to bear apart from having to attend religious school in the afternoon. I tried my best giving him maximum time to play, especially riding his bike, those video games and cartoons that he loves – I don’t want him to miss his precious time as a child for something he’d treasure later in life.
Days prior to the exams, I loosened him up, free to play games, watch TV, laze around… whatever he liked doing… but NOT to touch on books. To me, it was all done as far as preparations were concerned. And…right after the exams, I went through checking his papers (I didn’t want to but Sam pushed me to) and I was pleasantly surprise, for instance, in mathematics, he got only 3 questions answered wrongly and they were only due to his carelessness, not that beyond his comprehensions. The standard of learning for kids today is so high as compared to some donkey years ago when I took up similar exams. (During my time, similar exams were held in Standard 5, called Penilaian Darjah 5). Even I myself who used to take up mathematics up to 400-level at the university didn’t actually find it that easy, or perhaps the lapse of time has been far too long since I started my working life. And…other subjects are equally of a higher standard as well.
As-a-matter-of-factly speaking, it is not getting 5A that matters to me but when he comprehends well on what had been taught in school, matters, and that is even more compelling to me. Straight A’s is just a bonus. I’ve made a strong statement instilling my homespun philosophy to my kids; learning is not just for the sake of making grades, not about positioning yourself in the group of “elite” students, not about being what number you are at amongst the peers but to understand & appreciate what knowledge is all about, what it really means in practical life and thus makes you see the apparent relation & compatibility in ‘you reap what you sow’. Some kids or adults if you like, due to their lower aptitude level by birth, they may not score in the first sitting, perhaps they would only excel in the second or third attempt or in any number of attempts for that matter. So, what difference does it makes in the true connotation of what learning & knowledge is all about? Fast or slow, now or later. Scoring grades does not necessarily grant you as knowledgeable as to-be-looked-smart would. Sufficed to say, the institutionalized formal learning in schools and colleges is only a small fraction of the whole universe of knowledge.
Sam's big sister, Fara, she had got 3A’s and 2B’s in her UPSR some two years back, I was just as happy. I consoled her frustration, praised her, celebrated & rewarded her for what she had got, knowing the fact that she was essentially at the standard of 5A’s in my eyes.
When the mother said he could only lie down at least one-half hour after a meal, he’d time his stopwatch to exactly 30 minutes then he’d lounge around if he had to and had it observed religiously. An Ustazah told him one has to answer to parents’ call even while in-prayer, and he did, then he’d start it all over again. I felt sorry for him and told him to go by with it. I said watching TV is allowed until 8:00 pm only; right on the dot he’d either have it switched off or he’d be doing his school works. 10:00 pm in bed? Precisely on the minute! That is Sam! Sure he is a kind of kid that parents would love to have. In fact Fara and Edrin are no exceptions either; it’s just that I want to focus on Sam in this entry for an obvious reason.
Slightly more than an hour ago, UPSR results were out. Sam sent me text message telling me he’s got 4A 1B, some 10 minutes before I start writing this. I called him up right away and he said he was sorry for not getting straight A’s and he was so depressed with the results. Obvious blemishes in my eyes while talking to him – he talked with that kind of tone of voice apparently not happy with the results, I know he had cried, and very quick I consoled him up telling that was very good already, nothing to be sorry and I was equally happy as him getting all A’s.
Regardless of the results he’s got, I am actually very happy considering his promising performance months before the actual exams took place. Rather unfortunate he didn’t make it all A’s. I’ve never made a pass to him letting out my expectation as not to pressure him up and in the first place, straight A’s isn’t the scale I measure things up anyway. I regularly went through checking all the topics on the syllabus for each subject months before the exams making sure he knows what he had learned whilst the bigger contributions had been by his mother, to patiently be by his side as he finishes his home works every night and to reward him with a cup (read: mug) of milo moments before going to bed. We both parents knew he didn’t need tuitions when he was coping well with it. The existing loads at school are already too much for him to bear apart from having to attend religious school in the afternoon. I tried my best giving him maximum time to play, especially riding his bike, those video games and cartoons that he loves – I don’t want him to miss his precious time as a child for something he’d treasure later in life.
Days prior to the exams, I loosened him up, free to play games, watch TV, laze around… whatever he liked doing… but NOT to touch on books. To me, it was all done as far as preparations were concerned. And…right after the exams, I went through checking his papers (I didn’t want to but Sam pushed me to) and I was pleasantly surprise, for instance, in mathematics, he got only 3 questions answered wrongly and they were only due to his carelessness, not that beyond his comprehensions. The standard of learning for kids today is so high as compared to some donkey years ago when I took up similar exams. (During my time, similar exams were held in Standard 5, called Penilaian Darjah 5). Even I myself who used to take up mathematics up to 400-level at the university didn’t actually find it that easy, or perhaps the lapse of time has been far too long since I started my working life. And…other subjects are equally of a higher standard as well.
As-a-matter-of-factly speaking, it is not getting 5A that matters to me but when he comprehends well on what had been taught in school, matters, and that is even more compelling to me. Straight A’s is just a bonus. I’ve made a strong statement instilling my homespun philosophy to my kids; learning is not just for the sake of making grades, not about positioning yourself in the group of “elite” students, not about being what number you are at amongst the peers but to understand & appreciate what knowledge is all about, what it really means in practical life and thus makes you see the apparent relation & compatibility in ‘you reap what you sow’. Some kids or adults if you like, due to their lower aptitude level by birth, they may not score in the first sitting, perhaps they would only excel in the second or third attempt or in any number of attempts for that matter. So, what difference does it makes in the true connotation of what learning & knowledge is all about? Fast or slow, now or later. Scoring grades does not necessarily grant you as knowledgeable as to-be-looked-smart would. Sufficed to say, the institutionalized formal learning in schools and colleges is only a small fraction of the whole universe of knowledge.
Sam's big sister, Fara, she had got 3A’s and 2B’s in her UPSR some two years back, I was just as happy. I consoled her frustration, praised her, celebrated & rewarded her for what she had got, knowing the fact that she was essentially at the standard of 5A’s in my eyes.
27 comments:
4A 1B is equal to 5A.
Congratulations Sam, we're proud of you. I wish I had a son as good as you...!
Tahniah...
jange' sedih sedih, pan'je lagi perjalanan...
1.Congratulations to Sam (4A is still better than 4B,4C&4D)
2.Also, congratulations to you.. Gab & family for creating a `healthy environment' at home.
3. And HAPPY SCHOOL HOLIDAYS..to your kids.
tahniah buat SAM....
4As is good enuf. tell SAm it's not easy to get 4As. And even he got 5As, his mum n dad sure tak baginya gi boarding school. So won't make any difference. Hehe! And tell him not to worry, ada banyak lagi periksa besar for him. this is just the start. Enjoy the holiday.
Congratulation to Sam.
congrats to Sam! Best of luck in yr next undertaking...
Congrats to Sam! Tell him, 4As already an achievement to be proud of..& bersyukur pd Allah. My nephew lagi teruk - takde A pun & ada D lagi, one niece dpt 1A & 2B2C & another 5As! I'm involved a lil'bit in their studies - gv tuition. All 3 are budak bandar, but wat makes the difference is the parents' attitude towards education & how they're seriously involved at the ninny-gritty level.
Well, 5As isn't everything but it's definitely something!
Thanks GAB and Congratulation to SAM.
true story for SAM...
saya malas waktu sekolah rendah, byk main, suka pukul pengawas, hahahah sbb pengawas suka catat nama saya dlm buku diorg sbgai student plg awal balik :).
dipendekkan cerita UPSR sy dpt 1A,2C,1D... kalau ikut turutan jadi ac/dc (cam kumpulan rock tahun 80an, sure gab tahu heheheh)... tp waktu tu sistem pembelajaran tak mcm skrg (salahkan sekolah pulak dah).... everything ade proses sam (err..err sampaikan pada sam tau gab) lama kelamaan br tun tahu matlamat tun gi sekolah, study cam biasa, main still bayk, balk sekolah masih awal (jgn ikut mcm nie sam, utk tun ade sbbnya ehehehe) alhamdulillah PMR kuar result yg baik, dok asrama, bertahun2..sampai habis spm, dok kampus pulak... jadikan yg satu B tu sebagai peringatan utk dptkan A dimasa akan dtg, ok SAM.... take care SAM, suasana tingkatan 1 lagi adventure :).
jgn beri tekanan pada diri sendiri :)
p/s: tun selalu tipu anak2 buah kate tun dpt 4A upsr, (saje nk kasi motivasi skit, suh diorg challenge me) sbb diorg selalu sangka pak ndak diorg nie bijak, well tu apa yg diorg nmpk hehehehe.
Oops suka masuk kelas sains waktu sekolah menengah sbb cikgu cun, tp 4 bulan jer, sbb sy lebih suka art hehehehe.
Tahniah - it is okay, u passed! No one is ever going to ask you how many A's you get when you are well and above it. Guess what my children always say when i asked how many A's they get? Mama, youare very malaysian! Indeed!
Well done Sam!
hi, my 1st time here & already in love with your writings. will keep coming for more. my congrats to sam.
it doesn't matter where he starts, what matters most is where he ends :)
Kalau sam sedih pasal result sam tuh, bawak jer dia gi jalan-jalan, nanti kuranglah sikit kesedihannya. Anyway, congrats tu Sam from uncle berlingo
tahniah dari nani tuk sam..dan juga gab sefamily..
GAB,
My congratulations to Sam!What really matters is that he had done his best.Result is only the outcome of how Sam answered the exam papers.
My youngest son now is preparing for his SPM.When he was in std 6,he got 3A and 2B,but he scored 7A's in his PMR.As a father,I have my own views.You can read my letter to my son a few years ago at:
http://www.geocities.com/mohdadib/ckk53.html
congrats to your kid. i pun masa penilaian dapat 4a1b, it's not the end of the world. btw, sam ni aje baca your blog ke ?
AMARIA --> Thanks for the encouraging remark.
PB --> Correct, it's only the beginning. We hope for the good one to boost the kids' confidence, SAM is doing not bad after all
KPOI O --> I accept the conratulatory on Sam's behalf. I'll ask him to read. Well, try my best to have the family to sail smoothly as possible with the kids' healthy growing up years on mind.
LAN RAMBAI --> I'll ask to read the blog to make him feel good.
DLT --> You woke me up from being at the cross junction whether to let him go to boarding school or not if he gets 5A. One thing 4 sure, it's hard to let go since I always want him to grow up before my eyes and the practical thought also comes in, it's good for him to go for that kind of school will provide good learning environment.
ANGGERIK MERAH & KICAPSODA --> I'll let SAM read what you said.
RAD --> Agree, 5A is not everything but definitely is something. Again, it serves as a booster for the kids with 5A in their records.
JOKONTAN --> Sam sure will read this and he'll be happy with the congratulatory messages.
IDAHM --> Nice seeing you here and I really miss your bantering Sir.
Love being a father!
TUN --> You were such a nasty kid TUN, wakakaka. Anyway, agree with points you had to say.
KAK TEH --> Yeah, it's very Malaysian if we concern too much on the A thing. Being exposed to outside world myself, I have a thinking of learning has got more than what A's can offer.
MOMMY @LIF --> Thanks for dropping by and love to have you around more often. Gone to your blog, it was nice to travel through the thoughts of a (young) mother.
BERLINGO --> I did that Sir, sire it has helped him a lot.
NANI --> TQ NANI...
ABANG DIB --> I read what's in that link. I was blown away with what was on your mind with your the 11 year-old son.
MERAPUMAN --> Correct, it's only the beginning. Yeah, I'llask him to read.
i am sure Sam will grow up to be as good as his father
pstt, i love your presentation, very energetic n very convincing. bila nak buat pembentangan lagi ek?
Naper lambat cakap buat open house hari tu. klu tak boleh plan awal2.
Tahniah utk Sam
dah cek e-mail? i am sure you can capitalize on that thing. kalau perlu tina boleh set appointment dgn boss secepat mungkin. hahhh rupa2nya buat open house tak cakap, kalau tak boleh gak datang n knl yr family. sam ok ke?
Hi, Gab
I´ve been a schoolteacher for ages, and to tel you the truth, I think that not all exams are intelligent. That´s why it may be hard to get A´s, in some cases.
Dear Mr. Gab
Salam..
kagum.. kelu..tak percaya![sambil tengah geleng kepala]
Frankly speaking, you are the type of father I yearned to have! Still remember when I came back from school with 6A1 & 2A2 for my SRP, beaming & grinning from left to right, telling my father the good (enough for me) news, my father instead asked me bluntly "what happened to the other (2) A1s?".. and that was in 1990!
Sam, you sure one lucky guy to have such a supportive father!
oh ya, thanx for visiting my blog. Really appreciate it ;)
Tahniah Sam! auntie dulu masa penilaian darjah 5 cuma dapat 1A, 3B & 1C jerkk....:-D. Semoga Sam akan lebih cemerlang & terbilang dimasa hadapan..InsyaAllah!
TINA --> Like I said, I can speak (present) better than I can write. And, I thought it wasn't that good, I always not pleased with my presentations for I'd regret for not saying out the way I was supposed to say it. Errkk.... It was a small open house meant for my neighbours.
IZZA --> I shouldn't have said the invitation was meant for the open house as it was not to that measure, instead, just come over for weekend visit... heh
WOMAN AT THE WELL --> Yeah, the definition of exam somehow slowly but sure will reach the ral objective in our country.
BUTATULIBISU --> Thanks for comin' over man. I enjoy your bantering though sometimes I left no trace.
SHIHA --> You yourself are a lecturer, you know better what education is all about. You and I are the new breed of parents, perhaps everyone is now; we wanna see more than just passing exams for our kids. Thanks for dropping by.
DEA --> Scoring grades is just a part of life. We may shine better than the grades do.
kali pertama komen. tp aku respek la kat ko sbb tidak terlalu menekan anak2. aku kerja guru dan biasa la berhadapan dengan ibu bapa pelajar masa ambil keputusan periksa. dan terus terang aku cakap, kadang2 sedih tengok ada ibu bapa yang terlalu menekan anak2 untuk dapat keputusan terbaik dan mengkritik anak tersebut, siap bandingkan lagi dengan ayat seperti 'abang ko dapat pangkat 1 spm, kakak ko dapat 9a pmr. sepupu ko boleh belajar kat oversea' dsb sedangkan aku tengok anak tu bukan malas belajar pun (lain la kalau malas). pelajar aku tu dah cuba yang terbaik tapi nak buat macam mana, kemampuan dia tahap tu aje (ye la kemampuan budak bukan sama kan. sbg contoh ada yang suka math tapi ada yang tengok nombor je boleh migrain). akibatnya bukan budak tu makin semangat belajar, lagi tertekan tu ada la. sbb? majoriti di malaysia ni terlalu berorientasikan peperiksaan
anyway, bagus la kalau kau pun tidak terlalu menekan macam tu. kalau la ada ramai ibu bapa macam ko dan psgn kan bagus. kirim salam kat anak ko dan tahniah kat dia dan harap dia tahu TAK DAPAT KEPUTUSAN TERBAIK IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD!!!
p/s: sori, terkomen panjang la pulak
kalipertamasinggah --> Thank you for singgah. And thank you for making me feel good over my way of educating my kids. Having exposed to the western way of looking at education, I am not an exam-orietated person. All I want is for them to comprehend what they've learned and later to emphasize on what they like, support in their interests in certain subject / things they wanna do for lives.
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