Saturday, January 21, 2006

My Favourite Hangout Places

One of the places that I love to hang out when I want to be with myself is The Dome, KLCC. I just love sitting there sipping a cup of Cappuccino, watching the fountain, people around, the sorrounding buildings. At times I'd go after something light to go with my Cappuccino. May be I do not have much time to sit around now but once in a while, in the evening especially after having appointments around that area, I'd stop by. I'd proceed back to office before Maghrib.

Another place that I like to be with myself is spending my own quiet moment over in Kemansah. From the Zoo Negara entrance, leading towards Zoo View, just drive deeper there's not-so-famous place that I love to be at. I'd be sitting at the bank of the stream, watching the water flows, collecting rocks and throw them back in the water.
The option to be in the woods is way lot better than at The Dome, KLCC.


Friday, January 20, 2006

The Ship

I was in my bedroom, an apartment located at 42nd Street. The apartment was on the southern part of the university campus, a few blocks away from main street, Hampton Boulevard. It was winter time. Snow had been falling since early morning. I had just shifted away from study table working on my assignments. Grabbed a warm coffee on the cozy and headed towards window on the west wing. I was taking time out for a few minutes because I was stucked on certain solutions in my assignment. The window was facing Chesapeake Bay where the biggest Naval Base in the US was located. From the distance, amidst the beautiful view of the snowfall, I could recognize very well the carrier named Nimitz, such a mighty nuclear-powered ship carrying thousands of personnel with many types of aircrafts on it. How do I know that was Nimitz? At that time I remembered the playcards I was playing with when I was little. It was a deck of cards with pictures of ships on it. I kept the cards until they were all worn out. I was smiling to myself when the real ship was just a matter of a mile away from me of which I used to admire from the playcards I had during my childhood days.

That was a piece of sweet thing happened years back when I was in Norfolk, Virginia. I am very particular over small things that would contribute to memories. That kind of feeling is so personal to me. What's the big deal? No big deal, but to me... personal that is, it touched my heart. It's not seeing the ship that matters much but the memory of carrying around the playcards and fantasizing over the ship as my toy that could be sailed in the murky water in the ditch behind the house, matters.


The Lightning Strikes The Bridge

One of the books that I enjoy reading, PSYCHO-CYBERNETIC by Donna Sommers. The book has taught me something. It is first published in 1960's. The book has been improvised by a student of hers titled PSYCHO-CYBERNETIC 2000. The content in the book is very much spiritual in the context of opening up our minds in facing harsh reality of life. In other context, it may as well serve as handbook for soul-searchers. I recommend you (read, YOU) to have a copy of the book. You may buy it at MPH Book Store.

One of the lines in the book I want to share here is "The lightning striked the bridge while you were on it. With or without you on the bridge, lightning still strike the bridge". (Literally in Bahasa Malaysia: Petir memanah jambatan semasa anda berada di atasnya. Samada anda berada di atas jambatan atau tidak, petir tetap memanah jambatan tersebut).These lines has left me with deep thoughts. What exactly it means?

It means, whatever problems we are facing, it is due to the involvement of us in the matter whether with or without our consent. If we in the first place have nothing to do with the matter, not even knowing the existence of matter, not having any slightest thought of it, let alone the physical involvement or any other things possible that might relate to us in any ways, we will definitely not have to face the ground zero effect nor the shrapnels and debris out of it. On the other side of the leaf, though we have nothing to do whatsoever with the matter, yet the same problem still exists and it persists, perhaps other people have to face it.

In running our daily lives, we somehow may be caught in the situations where we have to face the tribulations & predicaments and we find it so hard to be out of it. Worst still, we never plan to even be in the cause of it initially. We know that somehow we have to face it.

Since we are left with no choice but to face it, why not we just tell ourselves this is only temporary. Problems are not meant to ruin us up but to enhance us instead. If we do not face this problem, we might be facing another set of problems somewhere... still a problem. If we think the existing problem shouldn't be ours and there must be someone else dealing with it, yupe, correct thinking,... but... in a matter of "problem" as per se.... it is still there waiting to be dealt with...

Think about it!


Thursday, January 19, 2006

A Beautiful Prayer

It's been in my mail for ages. I keep it because it means something, it is "food for thoughts". Now I'm sharing it with you here.


I asked Allah to take away my habit.
Allah said, No.
It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up.

I asked Allah to make my handicapped child whole.
Allah said, No.
His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary

I asked Allah to grant me patience.
Allah said, No.
Patience is a byproduct of tribulations;
it isn't granted, it is learned.

I asked Allah to give me happiness.
Allah said, No.
I give you blessings; Happiness is up to you.

I asked Allah to spare me pain.
Allah said, No.
Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares
and brings you closer to me.

I asked Allah to make my spirit grow.
Allah said, No.
You must grow on your own! ,
but I will prune you to make you fruitful.

I asked Allah for all things that I might enjoy life.
Allah said, No.
I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things.

I ask Allah to help me LOVE others, as much as He loves me.
Allah said...Ahhhh, finally you have the idea.

May Allah Bless You,
To the world you might be one person, but to one
person you just might be the world"

For all the negative things we have to say to selves
Allah has a positive answer for it.

You say: "It's impossible"
Allah says: All things are possible

You say: "I'm too tired"
Allah says: I will give you rest

You say: "I can't go on"
Allah says: My grace is sufficient

You say: "I can't figure things out"
Allah says: I will direct your steps

You say: "I can't do it"
Allah says: You can do all things

You say: "I'm not able"
Allah says: I am able

You say: "It's not worth it"
Allah says: It will be worth it

You say: "I can't forgive myself"
Allah says: I FORGIVE YOU

You say: "I can't manage"
Allah says: I will supply all your needs

You say: "I'm afraid"
Allah says: I have not given you a spirit of fear

You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated"
Allah says: Cast all your cares on ME

You say: "I don't have enough faith"
Allah says: I've given everyone a measure of faith

You say: "I'm not smart enough"
Allah says: I give you wisdom

You say: "I feel all alone"
Allah says: I will never leave you or forsake you

You say: "Nobody really loves me"
Allah says: I love you


Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Another day in Paradise

As a matter of fact, I have no idea whatsoever with the topic I wrote above. It just happened to come out in my mind the moment I started writing.

It must be an impromptu and I do believe the unplanned words or thoughts are always the most honest we can get without prior thinking. Look at the small kids. They would just bloat things out without much analytical done or rather none at all. They just say what they feel and not prepared for the consequences out of that.

As we grow older, we become more analytical and more diplomatic over the words as our mental developed and maturing over the years.

Like what I am trying to say here, the topic above is just popped out of the blue. Perhaps deep inside me I feel somewhat happy with the life that succumbed. Over the years I have learnt to accept things that may come crossing my way. Being hard-trained myself, I know what is all about to make the best out of what I have. I used to be walking around town penniless, not a single sen in my pocket. I used to go hungry and have nowhere to turn to. Well, what could it hurt, I managed my way through. I always believe help is on the way, it's just a matter of time. With that kind of persistency in my thinking, it happened to be true, at the end of the day, I'd always see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Well... it's time for a break


Monday, January 09, 2006



I found these lines are very interesting....

If I had My Child to Raise Over Again"
By Diane Lemons

If I had my child to raise all over again :
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play.
I would run through more fields & gaze at more stars.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Pencil And Me

My childhood days are all heartbreaking to look back at, even until these very days, it has left me deep scars. Unlucky I was, after father passed away when I was only 2 years old, I had been an object to be passed around from one caretaker to another.

What did I know? I was too little then to rationalise what exactly was goin' on around me. All I know I felt so deserted, nowhere to turn to, no such thing as a place of comfort to pamper my feelings and emotions.

Last night I looked into my son's pencil box. All the pencils, some 5 of them apart from the ones still in the box yet to be used stored in the cabinet, were all well maintained and well-looked after (by my wife). What struck me at that moment was, the days I had to make do with a pencil just less than an inch long. Even my small hand, a boy aged 7 couldn't tolerate that short pencil to write. I knew I had to have new pencil but I was so scared to open up my mouth to tell the caretaker that I needed a new one. I was so paranoid over the bad remarks might be thrown at me when I had to tell or ask something, let alone to voice out my frustrations and despair. Based on many occasions before in some other matters, it always end up with me as a little kid just sobbing away in silence until I fall asleep - feeling unsettled until I didn't know what was the meaning of sad. So then with that less than an inch-long pencil, I creatively enxtended with the unused upper part of a pen I found somewhere in the house. Being a kid, I was so happy with the solution I came up on my own.

That's only a small piece of my story. I've been meaning to write more... to be continued!


Tuesday, January 03, 2006


It is so nice to see the sunset from my office. I always enjoy watching when it dips as much as I do enjoy watching it rises during the dawn. It really makes me feel so small watching the creation of God as the story tells from the beauty and marvel of the sun. My office in Megan Corporate Park is just nice facing the sunset, overlooking the highway with the traffic snarls.

I prefer to hit the road a bit later rather than wasting my time in the traffic jam. My normal practice is to have my Maghrib prayer performed in the office before go home. After all I have nothing much to hurry except when the glimpse of the wife and kids pass through my head.

Thought of after a prayer & a glass of teh tarik with my partners, I'll be heading home....


Year Opener

My first day in office for the year 2006... Hours ago, my wife and I attended to our youngest kid, EDRIN, at his sekolah agama. By the way, he's 9 this year. By then SAM 12, was already in school (Sekolah Kebangsaan). He'll be in sekolah agama only in the evening after Sekolah Kebangsaan whilst the sister, FARA, 14 was also in school.

Yesterday I briefed all my children on the routine flow once the school starts. I've illustrated thoroughly on their movements and transits for day's routine. Last minute touch-up on the preparations was done yesterday. It seemed that the boys need to have green-colored "samping" for their sekolah agama and blue-colored samping for their Friday uniforms at Sekolah Kebangsaan.

Apparently Sam needs another pair of shoes for sekolah agama. His shoes are black-colored for sekolah kebangsaan (he's a prefect) and indeed need another pair of white-colored shoes for sekolah agama. He styled himself with new shoes at the store and he was satisfied with it. When we came back home, so then we realised as both shoes are left-footed. He tried out only one shoe at the store. Couldn't help it but laughed. It was a bit late to go back to the store and today he has to make do with black shoes for sekolah agama before I have them changed in the evening.

....Oh boy, lemme continue after a few hours stucked in the meeting room. Yeah, my first day in the new year. Loosing steam... Better off I stop here and continue some other time.

God Bless,


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