De Motu Animalium

One of the things we may have taken for granted in our day-to-day lives is the way we move. The way we utilize our bodily functions for specific tasks. The way we use our hands and feet – the way we make gestures, the way we walk. To certain extent, we may be able to recognize someone of whom is dearly to us walking in the distance or moving in the silhouette. It is somehow a signature of each person through the way he or she moves.

If we were to go a little scientific over the fact, it is very much due to our motor skills, a skill that requires us to utilize our skeletal muscles effectively. Motor skills and motor control depend upon the proper functioning of the brain, skeleton, joints, and nervous system. We may have perfected the skills for the biomechanics of it ever since we first learned in our early childhood. The biomechanics of it was first explained in Aristotle’s book of De Motu Animalium, written some yonks ago, of which he detailed out in the application and derivation of engineering principles to and from biological systems. It further explains the pursuance of physiological difference between imagining performing an action and actually doing it.

In our layman understanding, anything less than perfect in the communique and coordination between the brain, skeletal, joints and nervous system, it will result a clownish and blunderous moves in a person – clumsy that is. And, clumsy persons can sometimes be a subject of ridicule as much as hilarity.

If there is an award for clumsy people, I would nominate my 28-year old nephew, the first-born of my eldest sister, to be a contender. He has got all what it takes to be the clumsiest person on earth. His day is not complete if he did not spill any drinks at the eatery, breaking cups and glasses, twitching forks and spoons sprung across the table, even hurdled to the next customers’ tables, bumping into things or fumbling around, to say the least.

As much annoying as it is hilarious, in many occasions we became the center of attraction at the restaurant when the sound of glass breaks or sudden moves of our chairs avoiding the spilled drinks cascading onto our thighs.

When it happens, I would have hard time to either remain in my straight face or to be round the bend or to laugh. It is not a laughing matter but knowing him, it has been much anticipated thing to occur and even to the point the way he fashions the look on his face the time it happens, it would tickle you. I can bet, even you couldn’t hold your laugh if you were in my place.

At one time, after much struggling for him to keep the glass on the table after spilling his Teh-O-Ais, the glass unfortunately, shattered on the floor. He looked unnerved in his panic to keep the glass from falling off. That alone was enough to tickle you. I wanted to keep straight face. And I did. But, on impulse, he stood right up and in his loud voice perhaps camouflaging his embarrassment, he addressed the owner, “Berapa kena bayar gelas pecah ni?” (How much do I have to pay for the glass?”) It was so timely that it snickered, tickled your funny bones. Lucky I was not gulping the drink at that time, if not, I would have spurted the drinks through the nose. And so then I joined the patrons in another 4, 5 tables to burst in chorus.

He and his epicure wife are very enterprising. During the fasting month, he would lease out a stall selling gourmets and delicacies for buka puasa at Bazaar Ramadhan. It was more of moral support than actually a customer when I visited their stall on that evening. More often than not I’d get it free anyway. Well, it befuddled me when the stall was closed on that evening. I called his mobile when his wife answered and told me the whole freight for a day selling was tipped-off down the tarmac the time when they were setting up for business earlier. Walla wei! No wonder some traces of the mess were still there. It didn’t surprise me but it left me in stitches.

There was one time we were the guests in the house of a respected lady over in Seremban, together with a few others in a group. He was already displaying his true self upon entering the house. Taking off his shoes, he kicked the shoe off his right foot much too vigorous that the shoe flew at random. It was just a matter of inches off-target for the shoe to actually fly into the living room when it hit the wall. That was fine still, since the house owner did not realize it.

We were then ushered for a drink to a table with the glass top in her dining area close to the living room from where we were seated. Orange juice was on the menu that day and they were served in the glasses that placed on the saucers. You know, you had better be careful when picking up the glass with cold drink from the saucer because the saucer may stick to the glass.

Being him, he just picked the glass up without realizing the saucer clinging at the bottom. At the height of slightly more than a foot off the table, the saucer then gave way. It smashed on the glass table top. Of course the glass table top was not easily broken but the saucer was somewhat smashed into pieces. Man! The rest of us had a share of embarrassment but we detracted it off while passing some light jokes for cover.

He was then shifting to another corner of the table while the lady started sponging and cleaning the muddle. He squeezed himself between the chair and the wall and without proper admonition, he screamed out, “Aduhhh…Aduhhh…”

Everyone was astounded, afraid that he could have had stepped on the piece of the broken glass.

He was then leaping with a single leg to a stool close to the kitchen area. He sat on the stool, put his foot up and an object could be seen stuck in it. At closer look, it happened to be a Y-Shape structure of an upper torso of a fish bone. It must have belonged to a big fish considering the size of the bone itself. This time around, we couldn’t hold our laugh anymore. It was actually an accident more than clumsiness and it was not funny for stepping on the fish bone for it could've had happened to anyone since it was lying there on the floor.

What tickled us? It tickled when it was not anyone else but him, that lived up well to his attribute if not to his idiosyncrasy.

The question is, why him? Why? I could’ve had stepped on it and so could others. It only served as the reassurance on his clumsiness even God has played a practical joke on him with the twist of fate not to be in his favor. Or perhaps his bad vibes has invited and intensified the negative forces around him.






GAB: Are you as clumsy as my nephew? Bet you’re not.